Below is a list of roadblocks that people have and we address in Driving School for Life.  Each participant writes a Let It Go Letter to help all people facing a road block overcome them so that they can align their lives with their purpose and passions.  We believe that we should focus on what we can control and therefore all of the letters address internal roadblocks that stop us from living the lives we want to live.

Roadblock Index

Top Roadblocks

• Fear of Failure (mentioned 12x)

Social Roadblocks

• I often have an irrational fear or concern that I am not actually liked despite evidence of the contrary
• I worry too much about other people’s perceptions of me
• I am homophobic
• nobody knows me deeply though I have many friends
• don’t think I’m good enough for others so fake a lot funk
• society shaped more of me than I want
• I am not social enough or where I’d like to be socially
• I am always an outsider.  I have never really belonged to a group anywhere
• I don’t know people (network)

Mental Roadblocks

• I think too much x2

Spiritual Roadblocks

• It’s hard for me to interact with Christians now, even though I used to be a zealous one.
• I’m no longer Christian and now I’m afraid to voice my spirituality publicly
• I no longer have strong ties to the religion I was raised up with
• I feel ashamed for not trusting God with my problems

Sexual Roadblocks

• distracted by sexual impropriety: pornography, lust, etc
• my inability to say no has eventually gotten me sexually harassed and raped
• I am overly sexual
• I am hyper-sexual
• I am a homosexual
• sexually abused
• I love to watch porn

Financial Roadblocks

• I want to make a lot of money without losing myself
• I do not own a home now
• I’m scared to quit my job
• I talk down on rich people, but I want to be rich
• If I quit my job I will have a hard time sustaining myself
• I am afraid my debt will prevent me from fulfilling on some of my dreams
• I don’t have enough money to manifest my ideas
• conflicted relationship with money
• I am horrible at managing money
• I have a love hate relationship with money and it affects my hustle.  I don’t want it to drive me.
• I have debt that I am afraid will prevent me from fulfilling some of my dreams
• I’m broke
• I am afraid to be poor
• I fear that I will never find financial freedom
• there is little perceived economic incentive to be a good person
• I fear not being able to provide for my family economically
• afraid that I can’t survive while doing what I love
• I don’t have enough money
• I can’t be financially successful doing what I unconditionally love
• I’m afraid to quit my job to pursue my dreams
• I don’t have a paid job and no saving with $600,000 in college loans
• I am afraid to get physically sick or injured due to no or little health insurance
• I’m not finished paying off my school debts.
• I fear being poor
• I lie to friends about why I can’t go out because I don’t have the money
• fear of debt
• I’m afraid that my passion won’t bring financial wealth, which I was taught is important
• I have a love-hate relationship with money. I want to it. A lot of it. I don’t want it to consume me.
• I want lots of money though I look down on people who have too much
• I am fearful of becoming a sellout by succumbing to monetary vs. communal value
• fear of not being financially successful

Professional Roadblocks

• lack of mentorship
• I don’t feel good enough to do what I love
• I work in a cubicle.  Damn.
• fear of committing to 9-to-5 corporate environment
• At one point I put my career before myself, my family, and friends.  I was chasing paper and not living my dreams.
• I am afraid I’ll get stuck at a job I hate just to pay the bills
• inexperience in my industry
• I got laid off from my job
• can’t separate my personal and professional life
• I hate that sometimes I only make room for 1 of 2 options: 1. personal happiness vs 2. working to achieve a life goal.  Oftentimes they don’t intersect.

Behavioral & Reactionary Roadblocks

• I’m often arrogant
• I wish everything came easily/didn’t have to work so hard all of the time
• I’m not 100% me 100% of the time
• when things get hard, I run/leave, etc
• I’m a bit pretentious and elitist
• I can be extremely selfish
• I cry when I feel weak
• I can be egotistical
• I’m jaded

Intellectualy & Educational Roadblocks

• I didn’t finish college
• I am not good at math
• sometimes I don’t feel smart enough to live out my dreams
• I plagarized in school
• I question my intelligence
• Didn’t do well academically in undergrad
• I fear I will never finish college
• I didn’t finish high school because I was very bored in high school
• I didn’t finish college and get a degree due to funds
• I didn’t finish high school
• lack of knowledge
• I have incomplete college coursework
• insecure about the lack of prestige behind my education and upbringing and family
• my education, that I paid for and in paying for did not prepare me for what I want to do with my life

Familial Roadblocks

• pressure from my family to be “successful” (ie doctor, lawyer) – something they want, not what I want
• I don’t like talking to my father
• I’ve written ugly words about my mother
• I do not adequately support my family
• not loving family enough each day
• I’m ashamed of the type of son I’m been to my mother
• searching for biological mother
• I wish I had a father I feel left out without one
• I’m ashamed of the kind of son I’ve been to my mom
• my brother who I love most in this world is bipolar
• I fear that my family will never be able to fully embrace what I want to do with my life
• no one in my family really knows me
• will I be there for my  mom like she was there for me
• I’ve made many decisions with the driving force being “I don’t want to be like my mom/dad”
• not really understanding my culture/heritage
• mother passed away
• I think that many of my sibling’s problems are my fault
• living life without my parents who are deceased
• I’m afraid that my mother will die of sadness and we never have had a good relationship
• I don’t know my family
• I had a difficult relationship with my father growing up
• I worry about never having a family of my own
• I have no family (both recently died in 2007)
• I don’t have a good relationship with my father
• I can’t convince my mom to stop smoking
• I quietly hate my mother
• Will I be able to have a wife and raise a family
• I never knew my dad.  Died a month after I was born.  I recently learned that he may have died from AIDS from a blood transfusion.
• I am ashamed of my father (parents)
• I have negative  influence from my family
• I fear my family’s perception of me

Emotional Roadblocks

• I had an affair for over a year with someone who was/is married
• It’s easy for me to give love, but hard to receive it
• I’m scared of growing old alone
• fear of not being able to maintain relationships
• what if I’m not good enough for my relationship?
• I can easily give love, but have difficulty receiving it
• I fear close emotional contact. The fear of being in love investing yourself and somebody else
• I am both limited and empowered by my romantic relationship
• been in an abusive relationship
• I would rather not deal with romantic love because I’m scared of getting my heart broken again
• fear being alone and not being loved
• I am overly defensive (ie have trouble letting people into my life)
• No one really knows me deeply
• I don’t know what it feels like to really be loved
• I get too emotional about things
• I have low self esteem
• I’ve never been in love and I’m OK with that
• I fear not being unconditionally loved
• self-image issues
• I fear love
• I find it hard to be honest with the opposite sex
• In general, I distrust people and don’t let many close
• I am afraid of deep intimacy
• I am in a relationship I’m not sure I want to be in anymore
• my biggest fear is to not be loved
• most of the time, I feel I don’t deserve the love that is given to me
• I have never experienced a long term relationship

Childhood Roadblocks

• I was teased as a kid for not wearing the right clothes and being smart
• I was teased a lot as a child
• I have witnessed physical abuse within my family
• I am a child of a painful divorce
• I was not shown a lot of affection as a child and so it’s hard for me to share that fully with others today
• I come from a single parent home
• I was once a bully x2
• I was teased as a child
• I was born poor.  I grew up that way too.
• being a nerd and being made fun of in middle school
• I grew up in public housing projects for most of my early/teen life
• I grew up in foster care

Physical Roadblocks

• I have really bad body odor when I exercise
• I fear being alone
• I have sensative skin
• stress related diseases run in my family
• I am not as strong as I want and need to be physically
• I am 10 lbs underweight
• hair issue
• chronic fatigue
• physical insecurities
• I wonder can I keep my body fit and healthy
• I am scared every time I get an HIV/AIDS test
• I am not being all that who I can be because of pain in my leg
• bulimia from inability to cope, unhealthy body image, family issues
• I am very insecure about my body
• I don’t fully know how to rest
• help!  I’m trapped in a virgin’s body.
• I project very low when I speak
• I have buck-teeth
• having big thighs
• I have sight problems
• I am now officially over 200 pounds
• I am in the process of being healed of some dis-eases
• I hate when people judge me based on looks
• being fat
• I’m not physically capable of doing all the things I want to do
• I have excema
• insecurities of the body

Time-Related & Productivity Roadblocks

• procrastination x10
• I don’t have enough time to do my music
• lack of focus
• fear that I will never be consistantly on time
• I fear I will never conquer my chronic lateness
• Fear that I will never be organized enough
• question my ability to execute
• lack of organization
• I often spend more time in the thought and planning than action
• I have difficulty finishing things  strong though I start off great
• not enough time x2
• slow worker
• laziness
• I’m not consistent enough
• Too easily distracted
• feeling overwhelmed which leads to being unmotivated
• lack of motivation x2
• no follow through
• easily distracted/get pulled on tangents
• I am a perfectionist
• waste too much time
• lack of focus
• I can’t work in sprints
• I fear wasting time

Other Roadblocks

• fear of rejection x4
• inability to say no x2
• insecure x2
• I fear I won’t be remember when I die
• I’m doing what is expected of me and not what I want to do for myself
• I want to do more, give more, but am not at this time
• fear of not reaching full potential
• I’m too accepting and accomodating with people and personal problems
• I don’t know how to be more vulnerable with others
• I fear I won’t have an impact in any one’s life
• I hate washing my roommate’s dishes
• My passions seem to be on hold.
• I can be pretty oblivious at times…
• I am addicted to dutch masters
• I don’t volunteer
• people making assumptions about me cause I’m quiet: stupid, ignorant, dumb, etc
• I have anxiety..about everything!
• I can be materialistic
• I seek too much external validation (money, material things)
• I haven’t learned to address my own personal issues
• I am afraid to take risks
• I second guess my judgement
• fill my plate with too many responsibilities
• self-doubt
• feel looked down upon because of my passion
• there are too many possibilities to choose from and I believe I’ll inevitably make the wrong decision
• People are set in their way and I have no power to help them shape their path on a large enough level
• I don’t believe it is possible to be 100% me all the time because I’m still figuring out who I’m trying to become
• I’m too old to do hip hop music
• I fear mediocrity
• I have of fear of not being liked
• Sometimes I fear the future
• I can be very judgmental
• It’s hard to let go sometimes
• my community goals would probably not be the same if my people were the majority
• my self-esteem is low
• I am not as self-confident as I pretend to be
• I am not being my full self open and honest
• I feel pressure to succeed because of my priviledge
• I’m hispanic and don’t know spanish fluently
• being my own worst critic has prevented me from achieving some of my goals
• attention deficit
• vanity: I like to be the best at everything
• I am a shy person
• forgetfulness
• I fear not fulfilling my purpose
• I don’t know my life purpose
• self-absorbed
• I worry too damn much
• what if under everything I’m just a fuck-up?
• not living according to my values
• I have a big ego
• lack of self-awareness
• unintentionally judgmental
• not sure who to trust
• I struggle to see my strengths sometimes
• I am very laid back sometimes to the point of doubting my own self confidence
• no one know me deeply though I have many friends
• I believe that many/though not all people who are poor have significant responsibility for it
• fear that I don’t have what it takes to reach goals
• I fear people misinterpret my actions
• the quest for material possessions consumes me
• confrontation anxiety
• I spend absurd amounts of time often worrying about small things that don’t matter
• I’m an asshole
• I didn’t try hard enough in school
• worry and anxiety about people, work, and change
• I fear the shock of being abandoned – especially if by surprise
• I care what other people think and put their wants before mine
• I am very satirical
• I look down on my mom for decision she has made
• I fear that no one understands me or will even try to
• I think about what if I had taken the “easy” road
• I sometimes hand out too much
• I don’t like sitting by homeless people on the train
• frustrated with societal definitions of success
• deep down I’m afraid to go after my dream
• lack of foresight
• need to find better ways to take care of myself and make time to take care of myself
• I control everything in my life and when things don’t go my way I get frustrated
• I have low self-esteem
• I’m a shy person
• I’m selfish
• being unreliable to others
• I’m afraid to reach my full potential
• I’m afraid of success
• when I get upset my thoughts are often very violent
• had an abortion
• even after all my work, I’m still not perfect
• sometimes I find it difficult to be open with others
• I don’t know who I am
• fear of stagnation
• not articulate enough (can’t always communicate effectively enough with others)
• I have an ego I don’t like
• I am selfish
• I have racism in my that I want to get rid of
• I was physically and mentally abused as a child
• Even though I have issues I feel that I am great and have overcome at least 60%-65% of them
• More independent than I sometimes want to be
• I am scared of my talents
• I abhor washing my roommate’s dishes
• my faith in God waivers
• I fear dying alone
• I would not be comfortable standing naked in front of others or a group of people
• I don’t always keep my word
• I do not act on everything that I saw I will do
• I am my own worst enemy.  I jeopardize my skill set and credibility.
• I am jealous of other s doing their thing
• I want money though I act like I hate it
• I have lied to people about my past
• I am often overwhelmed by the magnitude of my goals
• I feel that I’m not enough sometimes
• Not 100% me 100% of the time
• I am too much of a dreamer
• I usually think about myself before others
• sometimes I’m ashamed of the priviledges I had being raised in a loving middle class family
• I feel like I’m not good at anything
• working too much & not enjoying life enough.  I’m afraid its going by too quickly.
• shy around people I don’t know
• I’ve walked away from responsibilities rather than confronting them
• I am inconsistent about effectively managing others
• Just need to let go and express myself
• No healthy rhythm to life
• lack of focus on my feeling and strictly to pragmatism
• I’ve been arrested
• I am not truly where I wish to be
• I feel misunderstood or unable to communicate what I’m about and who I am
• Insecure about my talent
• I’m afraid of failing
• I’m arrogant sometimes
• I fear getting my coveted opportunity and not knowing what to do
• feeling that I can contribute more to the group and a more practical way
• sometimes I have no idea where I am going to what in the world I’m supposed to be doing with my life. This can frighten and terrify me
• afraid of disappointing all those who are expecting so much for me
• I fear being unsuccessful
• always get sick when I stress out and then I put life on hold
• most people almost  make it
• nobody knows me deeply though I have many friends
• I feel like a disappointment to my family, friends, myself, and the world
• I’m afraid that my life will not make anyone’s life different or impact anyone’s life
• I am never as strong as I think I present myself to be
• I have a very hard time believing in myself
• fear of not being accepted
• I fear never getting an opening in life or opportunity to reach my goal
• I can’t stop listening to bad hip-hop
• I fear that I’m not good enough
• I care a lot about what people think of me. It is bad?
• I feel burdened because of my privilege
• I worry too much about other people’s perceptions of me
• I have confidence issues
• I have dreams and visions and then make excuses as to why I can’t do it. Negative thinking pattern
• I want to travel by don’t want to leave my responsibilities idle or neglect current opportunity
• I’m afraid of attaining my goal in getting bored
• I’m scared that no one will ever be proud of me or love me
• I’m too judgmental sometimes
• I hate the chosen few problem
• I am postponing dealing with personal problems
• I as physically, mentally, verbally, abused
• I need to open up more
• I fear that I won’t be respected
• issues with self-image and insecurity
• I feel as though I am not smart enough
• fear of the unknown.  Not knowing what comes next
• not being with the mate that I’m supposed to be with – settling
• fear of failing
• lack of effort
• I’m afraid to fail because I came from a generation of unrealized dreams
• I’m afraid of being a cheesy white lady
• I don’t communicate clearly (verbally or written)
• not pushing myself more
• many times I am self destructive because I feel it’s easier to end it then to live with it
• I am not patient
• I don’t like criticism which causes me to pull back
• fear of not accomplishing my personal legend (goal)
• not afraid of failing but at the same time afraid that in the end I will have regrets in life
• fear of embarrassment
• anger
• my view of life, spirituality, ideas often alienates me from others, but lonely
• self-doubt
• fear of never experiencing all life has to offer
• I do not belong to the race to which my passion belongs.  Racism sucks.
• I try to be optimistic but have a pessimistic outlook most of the time
• my time to succeed may have already passed
• oftentimes I feel like there is no support because people I know rather “security” and to be “realistic”
• do not know how to start what I love to do
• I am often more selfish, impatient, and unkind than I want to be.  I miss opportunities for kindness constantly.  I never stop to sign petitions for gay marriage or to talk about the environment.
• I had an abortion
• I fear almost making it
• unpassionate “lost”
• fluctuating self-esteem
• lack of self-esteem
• self-doubt
• fear of becoming an average Joe